Indeed, it was a powerful experience in D.C. -- though we had several very trying moments getting there while dealing with incredibly poor weather - one of the worst storms of the winter to hit the region before it moved up the Northeast coast. Our caravan of two minibuses included 30 persons and it was more difficult than we realized at first (with no restrooms on the vehicles) to get the gas, restroom and food breaks all coordinated! We passed three different accidents in Maryland that had "just happened" on toll-roads and interstates, and everything slowed up considerably, time after time.
This was all after our patience had been severely tried by some asinine state highway snowplow drivers on the PA turnpike - driving 5 abreast for about 40 miles or so - at 25 mph - sanding the roads but with hardly any snow or ice on the turnpike itself! We couldn’t figure out what the sam hill they were doing unless it was "preventive" in case it would freeze later. But, no, in spite of the obvious 5 or 6 mile long traffic jam they created, they went on and on an on....refusing to pause to let anyone pass -- which delayed and angered pretty much everybody.
After an interesting combination Metro/bus ride though DC that took twice as long as we had hoped to get to the Cathedral, we finally arrived to the service an hour and a half late (after having originally given ourselves plenty of time) just as the procession was exiting the church in the midst of an in-your-face sleeting windy gusting 30 to 40 mph "chilling-to-the bone" stormy blast for at least 15 or 20 minutes. (All we basically got to see was the inside of the Cathedral as the joyous participants were streaming out into the storm. It had been pretty well attended, virtually full, with an over-flow crowd of about a thousand at another church nearby.)
We were informed that a DVD of the music and speeches during the worship service will be developed and available soon. I imagine that will be very worth ordering to enable those who couldn't attend to gain a bit of the feel of the movement -- from lament, to the cross, to the power and hope that imbued that Lenten worship experience. (Our caravan members are interested in obtaining one as soon as possible, so that we can watch it together and reflect on the experience, our responses, and our involvement in follow-up interactions within our own locale in Michiana.)
Significantly, as the throng assembled and we marched about a dozen people abreast down one half of the street, we began to sing, waving our battery operated candles: "We are marching in the light of God..." Quite soon "the storm was stilled" for the rest of the experience - not just metaphorically, but literally. That four-mile march was spirited and invigorating; some of us estimated at least 3500 people participated. But was I ever glad I had the foresight to bring along my insulated boots - which helped keep my feet warm as well as my heart!
Someone said Saturday morning that we would likely have had at least 6000 people at the worship service; about 850 were registered for civil disobedience down at the White House culmination of the March, but only 275 did it - so that gives you some idea. They prayed beside the White House fence on the sidewalk where they did not have a permit to congregate, in groups, walking across the street to do so starting about 11:30 pm or so. It took the police practically all night to "process" them as it was - and they said later the police were courteous for the most part.
The major news media has pretty much ignored this action, except for a small article in the New York Times, and a great 4-minute piece on Saturday's "Weekend Edition" on NPR. Most of the media was focused on the demonstration by the storming radicals marching to the Pentagon on Saturday and the counter demonstration beside it - stuff a lot more flashy and attractive to the journalists, apparently. But I think what we had there is highly significant - perhaps the genesis of a time when many leaders are now willing to become personally very uncomfortable - and united - in order to send a powerful message to the rest of this nation and the world. This alternative leadership apart from the political process, emanating from the heart of faith, can only grow. Jim Wallis made it clear in his speech at the end of the worship service: "America is not the light of the word. Jesus Christ is."
The Spirit ran strong and our emotions were high. The rest of us ringed the entire ellipse surrounding the area, before going to our various places to stay, about 12:30 am. The very bad storm kept many from being able to get there, especially almost everyone in Virginia. However, I met a lot of very interesting people along the way, e.g. my fellow marchers included the national executive director of the Lutheran Volunteer Corp, Rev. Michael Wilker, who was looking forward to doing civil disobedience later that evening, a van-load of students from Bluffton University in Ohio who had just lost some friends from the baseball team in that terrible accident in Atlanta, some Catholic peace workers, a couple of Presbyterian families with elementary school children, a Methodist man from Baltimore who had marched in the 60’s - a communications specialist. He had trouble keeping his candle lit in its cup, but our conversation was bright. Many DC residents were waving at us from their apartment windows and even some diplomatic embassy headquarters, at that hour of the night - 10 or 11 pm, cheering us on. I could go on and on...
Mike relayed an incredible story shared during the service: A car-load of folks driving all the way from Spokane, Washington state hit a semi-truck during the storm (going under it somehow) just a couple states away from Washington DC. Miraculously - though the vehicle they were in was totaled - they somehow emerged relatively unscathed, so they hitch-hiked the rest of the way, and actually made it in time to that worship service Friday evening!
Mike also told me that the words of the first of the four speakers during the worship service - the Gold-Star mother who lamented what happened to her soldier son - were so moving and poignant that he thinks they should be read (or replayed electronically) from every pulpit in America during Lent.
We talked about what we might now very well be witnessing here in our land - the contemporary rebirth of something similar to the Confessing Church, inspired and nurtured by Dietrich Bonhoeffer in Germany during the rise to power of the Third Reich. We now have an ever-expanding corps of Christians from all corners of the faith spanning this entire nation - praying for the end of the war in Iraq, practicing nonviolence, studying the Bible's implications for our foreign policy, fasting regularly until the war ends, gathering strength from each other in prayer, study, and action - and in some places creating weekly peace witness events in their own local communities - all rooted in a common faith in Jesus Christ, the Prince of Peace. I wonder, could the new Christian Churches Together movement can take this on, as well?
Our group of 30 split into three for overnight lodging, and we all had a very short night of it on cots and sleeping bags in various places. I stayed with a dozen others at Eastern Mennonite University’s Washington Study Service Year House and had to put up with quite a bit of coughing and snoring – so you can imagine how that went - but at least I'd brought my Aerobed to make the most of the five hours of sleep I supposedly got!
I suspect we had at least three or four times that number at “the march” but about one hundred of us Mennonites actually made it Saturday morning to our own fairly informative and inspiring denominational gathering (utilizing the fellowship hall of the Capital Hill United Methodist Church.) This included some sharing - with only an hour's worth of sleep behind her- from Susan Mark Landis, who had a major hand in the overall planning of the whole event, and who had participated in the civil disobedience ("Divine Obedience!") the night before. We also heard insights from others on the Peace and Justice Support Network, hearing about some new ideas for peace advocacy, education, and resources for the Mennonite Church USA, including some new endeavors for and by the youth in our own denomination.
Some profitable time was spent listening to and interacting with Dr. Peter Dula, who recently joined the faculty of Eastern Mennonite University as an assistant professor of Religion and Culture, but spent quite a bit of time just prior to this as the Mennonite Central Committee's Iraq Program Coordinator. He shook things up a little by postulating that the two most practical actions we can take, if we are going to have any hope in actually challenging current policies, besides just talking about them with people in power, are to 1) get off the oil grid - by growing good gardens and ride bicycles as much as possible and 2) engage in war tax resistance! Well – now that generated some discussion! We then took time to process our experience of the weekend, thus far, in smaller regionally-based groupings before heading out.
Our caravan needed to leave DC by mid-day to return on what turned out to be a 13-hour drive home, including some very scary head-winds and more ominous weather on the alternate route we chose to take home using Interstate 68 (paralleling the "Old National Highway") up through Cumberland and over toward Morgantown, West Virginia. That stretch up in Garrett County, Maryland really does have a weather system of its own! It was literally the Grace of God our caravan got home in one piece (especially with me, sometimes known as a "lead-foot" doing a lot of the driving!) I crawled into bed at 3 am Sunday morning, tired to the bone, but recovered nicely by mid-forenoon.
Tuesday, 20 March 2007
Being In the Right Place at the Right Time (Part 2 in a series of reflections on "Things That Really Matter”)
It’s a bit like trying to take a sip from a fire hose lately, so the fact that the "Joint Commission" survey comes this week on the heels of what I experienced last week would definitely be "par for the course!" (For readers who may not realize the significance of that statement, the JCAHO is a national hospital and health care accrediting agency which shows up unannounced for four-day top-to-bottom surveys about every three years. It puts everyone a bit on guard, working fastidiously to make sure all is running smoothly, that all documentation is up to speed, and the atmosphere is in a welcoming mode to the surveyors who will try to find anything that is not according to our own policies.)
Nevertheless, here are my reflections about some important recent experiences. I decided if I don’t take the time now to reflect on the meaning of all this, and try to integrate what’s been happening in spite of the fact that the JC has arrived, then I probably never will. (That has happened far too often before.) It’s vital for me to take the time out of a pressing schedule – as my own form of prayerful meditation and thanksgiving for God's clear leading in my life - in order to be better prepared, mentally and spiritually, for the next few days ahead. In the big scheme of things - especially for someone in my line of work - that is what really matters: to be very present, listening to what God wants to address in my own life, so that I can truly be present to the needs of others, and in the right place at the right time.
To recap just a bit, I conducted the funeral yesterday (Sunday) afternoon for the 22-year-old former National Guardsman who joined to go to college but got sent to Iraq, then spiraled down into a serious addiction as a bright young college student after coming back and having great difficulty assuage his guilt and shame and the ensuing PTSD. He had OD’d once before, at college, spent a month in an ICU near there, then some time in prison and then on probation for what he’d done, and got "clean" - or at least his parents thought so. Just as his probation was finishing up he apparently slid back down the slippery slope, and last Monday accidentally OD'd from a shot of heroin, dying in the bathroom of the home of an acquaintance he met at work.
His mother is an ICU nurse here, and a very good friend -- and I was at her side at home about 15 minutes after her husband called me from New Hampshire where he was traveling on business - in the right place at just the right time.
This young man really was not a druggie living in the streets and it was not who this bright young man really was -- that became very clear during the funeral. It was quite clear that he had no intention of taking his own life. It needs to be clearly understood that though he was not attempting to commit suicide - since he loved life and thrived on excitement - he was so bored at the job he had recently. His mistake was thinking he could handle heroin by himself and get away with it, but was severely addicted, obviously, to the incredible "high" heroin provides. And what a storm this created within his family!
First of all, his involvement in the war in Iraq (his signing up with the National Guard, though motivated for the education opportunities it would provide for him, was done over the objection of his parents) had created a storm within that could not be stilled. He made some very poor choices at points along the way, thinking he was smart enough to handle heroin himself without submitting to therapy or sticking with an inpatient 12-step program.
This young man has a wonderful highly-educated and very involved extended family that gathered from all parts of the country this past weekend. I had already spent a couple batches of time last week, including quite a stretch last Thursday evening one-on-one with his mother and father and various members of his immediate family (he was the oldest of five children all fairly close in age to each other) followed by some group time reflecting on the tone and content of the funeral service on Sunday, sketching out some plans and possibilities for the flow of the service together.
I would be getting up very early - at 5:00 am the next morning (Friday) actually - to help drive a mini-bus loaded with Goshen College students headed to Washington D.C. to attend a special worship service that evening at the National Cathedral and a subsequent march to the White House as part of the Christian Peace Witness for Iraq.
This particular Christian public witness was timed to coincide with the fourth anniversary of the start of the Iraq War. Planned by some thirty-five Protestant and Catholic peace organizations and denominational leaders, which have been working in partnership since last fall, these groups have all been coming together around five basic affirmations, which are, in brief: (1) End the U.S. Occupation (a prophetic word), (2) Support Our Troops (a pastoral word), (3) Fund an international effort to rebuild Iraq (a word of moral obligation), (4) Say NO to Torture, and (5) Say YES to Justice (especially concerning poverty issues in the U.S.)
Nevertheless, here are my reflections about some important recent experiences. I decided if I don’t take the time now to reflect on the meaning of all this, and try to integrate what’s been happening in spite of the fact that the JC has arrived, then I probably never will. (That has happened far too often before.) It’s vital for me to take the time out of a pressing schedule – as my own form of prayerful meditation and thanksgiving for God's clear leading in my life - in order to be better prepared, mentally and spiritually, for the next few days ahead. In the big scheme of things - especially for someone in my line of work - that is what really matters: to be very present, listening to what God wants to address in my own life, so that I can truly be present to the needs of others, and in the right place at the right time.
To recap just a bit, I conducted the funeral yesterday (Sunday) afternoon for the 22-year-old former National Guardsman who joined to go to college but got sent to Iraq, then spiraled down into a serious addiction as a bright young college student after coming back and having great difficulty assuage his guilt and shame and the ensuing PTSD. He had OD’d once before, at college, spent a month in an ICU near there, then some time in prison and then on probation for what he’d done, and got "clean" - or at least his parents thought so. Just as his probation was finishing up he apparently slid back down the slippery slope, and last Monday accidentally OD'd from a shot of heroin, dying in the bathroom of the home of an acquaintance he met at work.
His mother is an ICU nurse here, and a very good friend -- and I was at her side at home about 15 minutes after her husband called me from New Hampshire where he was traveling on business - in the right place at just the right time.
This young man really was not a druggie living in the streets and it was not who this bright young man really was -- that became very clear during the funeral. It was quite clear that he had no intention of taking his own life. It needs to be clearly understood that though he was not attempting to commit suicide - since he loved life and thrived on excitement - he was so bored at the job he had recently. His mistake was thinking he could handle heroin by himself and get away with it, but was severely addicted, obviously, to the incredible "high" heroin provides. And what a storm this created within his family!
First of all, his involvement in the war in Iraq (his signing up with the National Guard, though motivated for the education opportunities it would provide for him, was done over the objection of his parents) had created a storm within that could not be stilled. He made some very poor choices at points along the way, thinking he was smart enough to handle heroin himself without submitting to therapy or sticking with an inpatient 12-step program.
This young man has a wonderful highly-educated and very involved extended family that gathered from all parts of the country this past weekend. I had already spent a couple batches of time last week, including quite a stretch last Thursday evening one-on-one with his mother and father and various members of his immediate family (he was the oldest of five children all fairly close in age to each other) followed by some group time reflecting on the tone and content of the funeral service on Sunday, sketching out some plans and possibilities for the flow of the service together.
I would be getting up very early - at 5:00 am the next morning (Friday) actually - to help drive a mini-bus loaded with Goshen College students headed to Washington D.C. to attend a special worship service that evening at the National Cathedral and a subsequent march to the White House as part of the Christian Peace Witness for Iraq.
This particular Christian public witness was timed to coincide with the fourth anniversary of the start of the Iraq War. Planned by some thirty-five Protestant and Catholic peace organizations and denominational leaders, which have been working in partnership since last fall, these groups have all been coming together around five basic affirmations, which are, in brief: (1) End the U.S. Occupation (a prophetic word), (2) Support Our Troops (a pastoral word), (3) Fund an international effort to rebuild Iraq (a word of moral obligation), (4) Say NO to Torture, and (5) Say YES to Justice (especially concerning poverty issues in the U.S.)
I had interpreted this event's meaning and purpose to this young man's mother when with her one-to-one earlier in the week, so they could understand why I would not be available to conduct the funeral on Friday or Saturday, but I didn't know how the whole family would take it at the time I shared that. Now, as I was with the family as a whole, and several of them indicated their support of such a thing, I felt heartened by this unusual juxtaposition of events and the timing of it all. Though my plans were already set, beyond my own personal interest, I felt now I could also go as a representative of this Guardsman's grieving family with a heightened sense of personal mission in the endeavor. Once again, I was definitely going to be in the right place at the right time - and there simply is no better "place" for a chaplain to be!
Wednesday, 14 March 2007
Focusing On "Things That Really Matter" (Part 1 in a series of reflections on this theme)
(Warning, this reflection piece is long, but it's my process of the last 30 hours and what is ahead - an intense time, indeed.)
I've arrived home several hours ago from a day away from the hospital, but involved with family and friends at my deceased parents' final estate sale and what it represents - the end of an era. My mother Edna died last April 25, and then my father Dean died October 30. I and my siblings and our family members had plenty of opportunity to obtain the special items we wanted to keep beforehand. That was handled quite fairly and equitably among us all in recent times, but it was hard to see the rest of the stuff just flitter away today into the rest of the community and other parts unknown - most of it at ridiculously low prices, of course! It was a multi-estate sale with stuff from three other families - all being sold in two simultaneous rings at the Elkhart County Fairgrounds.
The conversations were good though, and there were some memorable moments as well, watching who bought what to keep as symbols of their relationship with my mother or my father. For example, I had a great time getting to know a couple living in California who bought a number of things, including Dad's 1769 huge leather-bound Swiss German Bible still in pretty good condition and the old book on the sinking of the Titanic, and a great big box full of old Farm and Home Journals dating back to the 1910's and 1920's -- items which we'd left in the auction to help attract people there. I got to share some of the history behind the various items he and his wife had picked up. He got the Bible for $175 -- for his 87 year old mother who spent her life as a translator (knows a dozen languages and taught herself Hebrew and Greek) and still spends a chunk of each day reading the Bible in German.
Well, its just another significant milestone along the way in my ongoing grieving process.
The first thing I read when I got home earlier this evening was an email from Richard Yoder, one of our supportive and concerned volunteer on-call chaplains at Goshen General. He was asking if I still need someone to take call while I go to D.C. this Friday and Saturday. (Background: I'll be helping to drive a min-bus filled with Goshen College students and some other community members in a caravan to the National Cathedral in Washington to attend a special worship service and vigil marking the fourth anniversary of the start of the war in Iraq. (By the way, if any readers here are involved locally in conjunction with that major ecumenical event this Friday evening, are you aware of this resource?)
Anyway, here's the essence of my reply to Richard (which I copied the rest of the chaplain team)
-----
Yes I do, Richard. Friday night is covered but I still need help during the day Friday, or Saturday if that would suit you better. But also on Sunday - since I'll be doing a major funeral that day - due to the accidental drug overdose of the son of a much loved and respected ICU nurse; he lived at home with his family here in Goshen.
This young man's father called me from New Hampshire while on a business trip, just a few minutes after his wife (the ICU nurse, at home) was informed by the police about their son's death. He was found at the home of a couple of acquaintances from work. Though a very bright young man, he had, by all accounts, a very boring job at an automotive parts factory, but it's what he chose to do right now. These co-workers whom he barely knew invited him there after completed their third shift together, and he had apparently used their bathroom to "shoot up" - apparently thinking this was a "safe" place away from home where his actions wouldn't be discovered. Something went terribly wrong and he was discovered about 2 pm yesterday, out cold forever.
His parents are committed believers in the Christian faith, but have been in transition and "shopping around" for a church, thus do not have a good local connection yet to a pastor or a local community of faith. I spent quite a bit of time with that devastated mother and and this young man's traumatized girlfriend yesterday afternoon and evening, waiting for dad to catch a plane home from New England. They had no clue he had decided to use again, but had been through quite the ordeal with him in recent years. Later, in the evening, I helped the rest of the ICU staff on duty process this extremely difficult news from a beloved hurting colleague. They hurt for her deeply, as well, for they knew how much she had invested in her son and his recovery efforts - she had been very open with them about all this. This young man, now 22, had enlisted in the National Guard, over and above the objections of his parents, as an 18 year old, and sure enough - was sent to Iraq. The military offered virtually no follow-up debriefing nor counseling to him and his colleagues who returned home from that experience. He came back, having survived the war there, but with memories and issues he could barely speak about - likely afflicted by PTSD, but never diagnosed, then sunk into drug addiction to bury his pain while becoming a student at Purdue University. An earlier overdose there put him in the ICU at Lafayette for quite a while, then he came home, got involved with Narcotics Anonymous (his parents with Al Anon) as he finally "came clean" over many months - and then this.
Absolutely devastating. Such a huge waste of talent. He didn't get killed in the war there, but the one here got him.
His mother and father are not trying to find ways to put responsibility on others for what their son chose to do - they really do understand addictions and did an amazing job with the "tough love" and all that - but at the same time they are very, very angry at what has happened to him and his friends by being caught up in this war -- being ground up and spit out like they were - much more than an 18 year old should have to handle.
Ironic, that yesterday at about the same time he was discovered dead, this report was released and is a "top story" in the news today.
But I think the actual numbers they quote there are way too low because this is a study of the mental health issues of soldiers returning from Iraq was only among those actually being cared for specifically by the VA, and this young man was denied any help by the military. His mother told me she knows there are tons more just like her son.
-----
After examining my calendar for the rest of the week, I took some time to reflect for a couple of hours on what I've been experiencing lately, and to prepare myself for what will likely unfold as a very challenging/interesting/memorable week:
If you read this far, you already know that besides supporting this particular family as much as my schedule will allow, and preparing for the funeral on Sunday (it will likely be a big one and somewhat difficult to prepare for) I am already committed to that quick but important journey to Washington DC Friday, returning back to Indiana by 1 am early Sunday morning. By the way, I shared with that grieving mother, my dear ICU nurse friend, just why I am going to Washington DC and a bit about the nature of that event, because it was potentially going to effect on the timing of the funeral. But her response was heartening to me -- she said she is VERY glad I'm going and would not want me to miss it for anything. Now I'm going to be there on that young dead soldier's behalf, as well, representing his whole family.
At 7 am on Thursday, however, I'll be sitting down with our hospital's Ethics Committee when we will, among other things, be reviewing a proposed first draft of our policy for dealing with the ethical issues likely involved in a Flu Pandemic -- which are going to be overwhelming and inevitable if THAT ever comes around!
I'm also involved in an ongoing way with our (ecumenical) Goshen Ministerial Association, which meets monthly. Sure enough, our next one is this Thursday noon, the third session of a special series focusing on the immigration issue and discussing the plight of many of our local people directly affected by the attitudes and approaches of various business and government practices. We are, as pastoral leaders, in the process of getting better acquainted and developing deeper sustaining relationships between the Anglo and the Latino/Hispanic pastors which were heretofore virtually separate groups. And we are discussing various viewpoints on necessary reforms. But this time, in particular, we plan to focus on appropriate pastoral responses, as a community of faith, to the ICE raid in our area last week - and all the attendant vibrations set off in the immigrant community and among the rest of us trying to figure out the best way to be supportive, yet also constructive while calling for systemic legislative changes that make better sense.
I guess it's all part of what it means to be a hospital chaplain in a small town dealing with things that really matter in people's lives. I was thinking again this evening about how distinctively different many aspects of my life are from the way my parents lived theirs, yet undergirding it all are a lot of the same values. When it comes right down to it, I'm just a chip off the old block - finding joy in serving others - and dealing with issues that really matter. There is a deep joy and sense of fulfillment in doing that - and I can't think of a better way to honor them.
I read this piece to Carole Anne before sending it off, to gaining her comments and perspective. She thinks I need to send this it to various family members, as well as certain other friends - and I'm indeed grateful she is so supportive of these endeavors on my part.
For those of you taking in this message, who know and care about what is happening in my life - and Carole Anne's - know that I deeply value and acknowledge the importance of relationship, your support, and especially your prayers. Please pray that I will be able to maintain a warm heart, a sharp mind, an open hand, and a receptive spirit to all that God is asking me to do - and not do, as well!
All the best,
Clair Hochstetler
I've arrived home several hours ago from a day away from the hospital, but involved with family and friends at my deceased parents' final estate sale and what it represents - the end of an era. My mother Edna died last April 25, and then my father Dean died October 30. I and my siblings and our family members had plenty of opportunity to obtain the special items we wanted to keep beforehand. That was handled quite fairly and equitably among us all in recent times, but it was hard to see the rest of the stuff just flitter away today into the rest of the community and other parts unknown - most of it at ridiculously low prices, of course! It was a multi-estate sale with stuff from three other families - all being sold in two simultaneous rings at the Elkhart County Fairgrounds.
The conversations were good though, and there were some memorable moments as well, watching who bought what to keep as symbols of their relationship with my mother or my father. For example, I had a great time getting to know a couple living in California who bought a number of things, including Dad's 1769 huge leather-bound Swiss German Bible still in pretty good condition and the old book on the sinking of the Titanic, and a great big box full of old Farm and Home Journals dating back to the 1910's and 1920's -- items which we'd left in the auction to help attract people there. I got to share some of the history behind the various items he and his wife had picked up. He got the Bible for $175 -- for his 87 year old mother who spent her life as a translator (knows a dozen languages and taught herself Hebrew and Greek) and still spends a chunk of each day reading the Bible in German.
Well, its just another significant milestone along the way in my ongoing grieving process.
The first thing I read when I got home earlier this evening was an email from Richard Yoder, one of our supportive and concerned volunteer on-call chaplains at Goshen General. He was asking if I still need someone to take call while I go to D.C. this Friday and Saturday. (Background: I'll be helping to drive a min-bus filled with Goshen College students and some other community members in a caravan to the National Cathedral in Washington to attend a special worship service and vigil marking the fourth anniversary of the start of the war in Iraq. (By the way, if any readers here are involved locally in conjunction with that major ecumenical event this Friday evening, are you aware of this resource?)
Anyway, here's the essence of my reply to Richard (which I copied the rest of the chaplain team)
-----
Yes I do, Richard. Friday night is covered but I still need help during the day Friday, or Saturday if that would suit you better. But also on Sunday - since I'll be doing a major funeral that day - due to the accidental drug overdose of the son of a much loved and respected ICU nurse; he lived at home with his family here in Goshen.
This young man's father called me from New Hampshire while on a business trip, just a few minutes after his wife (the ICU nurse, at home) was informed by the police about their son's death. He was found at the home of a couple of acquaintances from work. Though a very bright young man, he had, by all accounts, a very boring job at an automotive parts factory, but it's what he chose to do right now. These co-workers whom he barely knew invited him there after completed their third shift together, and he had apparently used their bathroom to "shoot up" - apparently thinking this was a "safe" place away from home where his actions wouldn't be discovered. Something went terribly wrong and he was discovered about 2 pm yesterday, out cold forever.
His parents are committed believers in the Christian faith, but have been in transition and "shopping around" for a church, thus do not have a good local connection yet to a pastor or a local community of faith. I spent quite a bit of time with that devastated mother and and this young man's traumatized girlfriend yesterday afternoon and evening, waiting for dad to catch a plane home from New England. They had no clue he had decided to use again, but had been through quite the ordeal with him in recent years. Later, in the evening, I helped the rest of the ICU staff on duty process this extremely difficult news from a beloved hurting colleague. They hurt for her deeply, as well, for they knew how much she had invested in her son and his recovery efforts - she had been very open with them about all this. This young man, now 22, had enlisted in the National Guard, over and above the objections of his parents, as an 18 year old, and sure enough - was sent to Iraq. The military offered virtually no follow-up debriefing nor counseling to him and his colleagues who returned home from that experience. He came back, having survived the war there, but with memories and issues he could barely speak about - likely afflicted by PTSD, but never diagnosed, then sunk into drug addiction to bury his pain while becoming a student at Purdue University. An earlier overdose there put him in the ICU at Lafayette for quite a while, then he came home, got involved with Narcotics Anonymous (his parents with Al Anon) as he finally "came clean" over many months - and then this.
Absolutely devastating. Such a huge waste of talent. He didn't get killed in the war there, but the one here got him.
His mother and father are not trying to find ways to put responsibility on others for what their son chose to do - they really do understand addictions and did an amazing job with the "tough love" and all that - but at the same time they are very, very angry at what has happened to him and his friends by being caught up in this war -- being ground up and spit out like they were - much more than an 18 year old should have to handle.
Ironic, that yesterday at about the same time he was discovered dead, this report was released and is a "top story" in the news today.
But I think the actual numbers they quote there are way too low because this is a study of the mental health issues of soldiers returning from Iraq was only among those actually being cared for specifically by the VA, and this young man was denied any help by the military. His mother told me she knows there are tons more just like her son.
-----
After examining my calendar for the rest of the week, I took some time to reflect for a couple of hours on what I've been experiencing lately, and to prepare myself for what will likely unfold as a very challenging/interesting/memorable week:
If you read this far, you already know that besides supporting this particular family as much as my schedule will allow, and preparing for the funeral on Sunday (it will likely be a big one and somewhat difficult to prepare for) I am already committed to that quick but important journey to Washington DC Friday, returning back to Indiana by 1 am early Sunday morning. By the way, I shared with that grieving mother, my dear ICU nurse friend, just why I am going to Washington DC and a bit about the nature of that event, because it was potentially going to effect on the timing of the funeral. But her response was heartening to me -- she said she is VERY glad I'm going and would not want me to miss it for anything. Now I'm going to be there on that young dead soldier's behalf, as well, representing his whole family.
At 7 am on Thursday, however, I'll be sitting down with our hospital's Ethics Committee when we will, among other things, be reviewing a proposed first draft of our policy for dealing with the ethical issues likely involved in a Flu Pandemic -- which are going to be overwhelming and inevitable if THAT ever comes around!
I'm also involved in an ongoing way with our (ecumenical) Goshen Ministerial Association, which meets monthly. Sure enough, our next one is this Thursday noon, the third session of a special series focusing on the immigration issue and discussing the plight of many of our local people directly affected by the attitudes and approaches of various business and government practices. We are, as pastoral leaders, in the process of getting better acquainted and developing deeper sustaining relationships between the Anglo and the Latino/Hispanic pastors which were heretofore virtually separate groups. And we are discussing various viewpoints on necessary reforms. But this time, in particular, we plan to focus on appropriate pastoral responses, as a community of faith, to the ICE raid in our area last week - and all the attendant vibrations set off in the immigrant community and among the rest of us trying to figure out the best way to be supportive, yet also constructive while calling for systemic legislative changes that make better sense.
I guess it's all part of what it means to be a hospital chaplain in a small town dealing with things that really matter in people's lives. I was thinking again this evening about how distinctively different many aspects of my life are from the way my parents lived theirs, yet undergirding it all are a lot of the same values. When it comes right down to it, I'm just a chip off the old block - finding joy in serving others - and dealing with issues that really matter. There is a deep joy and sense of fulfillment in doing that - and I can't think of a better way to honor them.
I read this piece to Carole Anne before sending it off, to gaining her comments and perspective. She thinks I need to send this it to various family members, as well as certain other friends - and I'm indeed grateful she is so supportive of these endeavors on my part.
For those of you taking in this message, who know and care about what is happening in my life - and Carole Anne's - know that I deeply value and acknowledge the importance of relationship, your support, and especially your prayers. Please pray that I will be able to maintain a warm heart, a sharp mind, an open hand, and a receptive spirit to all that God is asking me to do - and not do, as well!
All the best,
Clair Hochstetler
Monday, 12 March 2007
Draft of letter to Editor of the Goshen News (I'll send once I figure out how to "boil it down")
March 12, 2007
I am writing to thank you for the solid editorial in Sunday's Goshen News regarding the Patriot Act being a ticking time bomb and how the higher-ups now express outrage over many FBI agents having overstepped authority. You closed by asking "Why do we feel like they are saying so with their fingers crossed?" Exactly. And let's scratch below the surface a bit more:
Three short statements gleaned from the USAToday's report on Friday are quite revealing:
1) One government official familiar with the report told the Associated Press that shoddy bookkeeping and records management led to the problems; the FBI agents appeared to be overwhelmed by the volume of demands for information over a two-year period.
2) Justice Department Inspector General Glenn Fine conducted the audit as required by Congress - but over the objections of the Bush administration!
3) National security letters have been the subject of legal battles in two federal courts because recipients were barred from telling anyone about them. Each NSL amounts to a gag on free speech, thus a federal appeals judge in New York warned in May that the government's ability to force companies to turn over information about its customers and keep quiet about it was probably unconstitutional.
Well, ya think?
Does it take a rocket scientist to figure out WHO is likely issuing the plethora of orders causing these FBI agents to feel so incredibly harried and overworked? The "outrage" of the officials is diverting from the issue about the record numbers of NSA requests, but focused solely on the accuracy of the record-keeping involved to stay compliant with the Patriot Act.
Sen. Feingold, D-Wis., a member of the judiciary panel, nailed it when he said the report "proves that 'trust us' doesn't cut it when it comes to the government's power to obtain Americans' sensitive business records without a court order and without any suspicion that they are tied to terrorism or espionage."
So let's think now about where this brings us...we're in a self-declared and permanent state of "war" in which the Constitution and our Bill of Rights are treated as quaint remnants of bygone era; we have a Justice Department led by a man who endorses torture. We have the suspension of habeas corpus, extraordinary rendition, and the ominous legal ideology of a "Unitary Executive" -- giving the US President the virtual powers of a monarch - the ultimate "Decider" he loves to think he is.
President Bush is overtly contemptuous of the very checks and balances necessary to a functioning democracy. He mislead the nation into a 4+ years of war already costing 3,200 American lives and untold billions of dollars, selectively holds himself above the law by "signing statements" intended to subvert the intent of legislation he dislikes, turns the White House staff into a propaganda machine fond of leaking classified information when it furthers his political agenda, and dismantles Constitutional protections by misusing the FBI's energies and side-stepping FISA in the pursuit of rapid domestic intelligence gathering. The proof is out there now.
So, the FBI no longer even pretends to operate on the principle of probable cause. We have an emergent surveillance society, even after a previous Congress discredited and explicitly forbade the data mining program known as Total Information Awareness. But it is not only back again, but back with a vengeance. George Orwell was right, but he was just a little off on the title of his book 1984 - it should have been titled 2007!
Does anyone else feel their nation has been truly hijacked -- and this time it's an inside job? I would like to think so, because current polls tell us 60 some % of the American people no longer respect what the President is doing in his job - at all. The President hasn't even been listening very well to his own top generals - his decision-making system can't be trusted - it's just plain broken. But he still has the audacity to act as if he is accountable to no one; loves to say and think he's the ultimate "Decider." To put it simply, we now have the most intrusive, cynically partisan and self-interested administration in our nation's history but also, simultaneously, the most secretive and corrupt.
Many innocent people in this country, and in Iraq, as well, are now being flattened by this steam roller whose operator has not proven trustworthy. The slippery slope of fascism looms large! You wonder about that? I encourage readers to take the time to review what historians say are its defining characteristics here or here - then see if you can draw your own parallels.
Senator Lugar, Senator Bayh - where is the outrage lasting more than one weekend news cycle? Where is true leadership in Congress when we really need it - to clearly tell the President that he's got to back down? What does it take for this country to wake up, acknowledge these trends, and seek the change it so desperately needs?
President Bill Clinton underwent impeachment proceedings for actions that basically amounted to marital infidelity on the taxpayer's dime; so I guess Bush/Cheney's transgressions must fall somewhere between "high crimes" and "misdemeanors."
Clair Hochstetler
(my address and phone number)
I am writing to thank you for the solid editorial in Sunday's Goshen News regarding the Patriot Act being a ticking time bomb and how the higher-ups now express outrage over many FBI agents having overstepped authority. You closed by asking "Why do we feel like they are saying so with their fingers crossed?" Exactly. And let's scratch below the surface a bit more:
Three short statements gleaned from the USAToday's report on Friday are quite revealing:
1) One government official familiar with the report told the Associated Press that shoddy bookkeeping and records management led to the problems; the FBI agents appeared to be overwhelmed by the volume of demands for information over a two-year period.
2) Justice Department Inspector General Glenn Fine conducted the audit as required by Congress - but over the objections of the Bush administration!
3) National security letters have been the subject of legal battles in two federal courts because recipients were barred from telling anyone about them. Each NSL amounts to a gag on free speech, thus a federal appeals judge in New York warned in May that the government's ability to force companies to turn over information about its customers and keep quiet about it was probably unconstitutional.
Well, ya think?
Does it take a rocket scientist to figure out WHO is likely issuing the plethora of orders causing these FBI agents to feel so incredibly harried and overworked? The "outrage" of the officials is diverting from the issue about the record numbers of NSA requests, but focused solely on the accuracy of the record-keeping involved to stay compliant with the Patriot Act.
Sen. Feingold, D-Wis., a member of the judiciary panel, nailed it when he said the report "proves that 'trust us' doesn't cut it when it comes to the government's power to obtain Americans' sensitive business records without a court order and without any suspicion that they are tied to terrorism or espionage."
So let's think now about where this brings us...we're in a self-declared and permanent state of "war" in which the Constitution and our Bill of Rights are treated as quaint remnants of bygone era; we have a Justice Department led by a man who endorses torture. We have the suspension of habeas corpus, extraordinary rendition, and the ominous legal ideology of a "Unitary Executive" -- giving the US President the virtual powers of a monarch - the ultimate "Decider" he loves to think he is.
President Bush is overtly contemptuous of the very checks and balances necessary to a functioning democracy. He mislead the nation into a 4+ years of war already costing 3,200 American lives and untold billions of dollars, selectively holds himself above the law by "signing statements" intended to subvert the intent of legislation he dislikes, turns the White House staff into a propaganda machine fond of leaking classified information when it furthers his political agenda, and dismantles Constitutional protections by misusing the FBI's energies and side-stepping FISA in the pursuit of rapid domestic intelligence gathering. The proof is out there now.
So, the FBI no longer even pretends to operate on the principle of probable cause. We have an emergent surveillance society, even after a previous Congress discredited and explicitly forbade the data mining program known as Total Information Awareness. But it is not only back again, but back with a vengeance. George Orwell was right, but he was just a little off on the title of his book 1984 - it should have been titled 2007!
Does anyone else feel their nation has been truly hijacked -- and this time it's an inside job? I would like to think so, because current polls tell us 60 some % of the American people no longer respect what the President is doing in his job - at all. The President hasn't even been listening very well to his own top generals - his decision-making system can't be trusted - it's just plain broken. But he still has the audacity to act as if he is accountable to no one; loves to say and think he's the ultimate "Decider." To put it simply, we now have the most intrusive, cynically partisan and self-interested administration in our nation's history but also, simultaneously, the most secretive and corrupt.
Many innocent people in this country, and in Iraq, as well, are now being flattened by this steam roller whose operator has not proven trustworthy. The slippery slope of fascism looms large! You wonder about that? I encourage readers to take the time to review what historians say are its defining characteristics here or here - then see if you can draw your own parallels.
Senator Lugar, Senator Bayh - where is the outrage lasting more than one weekend news cycle? Where is true leadership in Congress when we really need it - to clearly tell the President that he's got to back down? What does it take for this country to wake up, acknowledge these trends, and seek the change it so desperately needs?
President Bill Clinton underwent impeachment proceedings for actions that basically amounted to marital infidelity on the taxpayer's dime; so I guess Bush/Cheney's transgressions must fall somewhere between "high crimes" and "misdemeanors."
Clair Hochstetler
(my address and phone number)
Friday, 9 March 2007
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